POLICE OFFICER HAS NO PITY FOR PAULA ABDUL

Filed Under: American Idol > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Paula Abdul

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

Paula Abdul looked like she was walking on air at LAX this weekend. You’d think she didn’t have a care in the world. (Maybe she doesn’t. We still maintain that she will return to American Idol.) She was NOT happy to find a police officer writing a ticket for her limo driver. Paula turned on the charm, but the cop wouldn’t budge. He obviously had no sympathy for her career dilemma.

RIHANNA HAS HER CLAWS OUT

Filed Under: Chris Brown > Court > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Rihanna

Photo Credit: Buzz Foto

The countdown begins. Rihanna is scheduled to testify in court against her (ex? we’re not so sure…) boyfriend Chris Brown next Monday on June 22. Chris’s lawyer failed to get the date postponed so the show must go on, and it will be QUITE a drama. Meanwhile Rihanna is still in New York – she’s pictured here leaving her hotel with considerable fanfare. Judging by those red pointed nails, she’s sharpening her claws for SOMETHING.

RIHANNA, THESE FAKE BOYFRIENDS AREN'T FOOLING US!

Filed Under: Andrew Bynum > Boyfriend > Chris Brown > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Fake! > Rihanna

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News
It's painfully obvious that Rihanna is trying to pull a fast one on the press with all these fake “romances” that seem to be set up by her own people. First, she was linked with an ex boyfriend in Barbados, Negus Sealy, and that didn’t pan out. The she ran into basketball player Andrew Bynum in a restaurant, introduced herself, and insisted on being photographed with him. Rumors of a romance were rampant until he admitted he was flattered, but barely knew her. Most recently she was linked to rapper Aubrey “Drake” Graham, and that rumor proved to be false too. Chris Brown’s lawyer is currently plea bargaining with the prosecutor and hoping to avoid jail time for Chris’s beating of Rihanna in February. Rihanna wants it to look like she’s moved on and started dating other guys, when actually she is secretly still in love with Chris. We predict they will be back together as soon as Chris’ case is finalized.

JESSE JAMES REGRETS STEALING SCOTT HAMILTON'S PORSCHE

Filed Under: Celebrity Apprentice > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Jesse James > Scott Hamilton

Photo Credit: Splash News
Jesse James really IS a bona fide character. (And not so hard to look at.) It took Celebrity Apprentice to get him mainstream attention. He said the reason he signed to do the show was because skater Scott Hamilton was doing it also. According to the Daily News, Jesse felt guilty because when he was 17 he had stolen Scott’s 1985 Porsche Targa that was parked in front of his San Diego Apartment. He always “felt bad about it.” During the show, Jesse finally had the chance to confess his crime to Scott and did so. Scott was startled, but admitted “Twenty years later, I found it FUNNY that Jesse stole my car and stripped it!”

WHO IS ADNAN GHALIB ALL DRESSED UP FOR?

Filed Under: Adnan Ghalib > Britney Spears > Crimes and Misdemeaners

Photo Credit: Splash News

The judge, that’s who. Britney Spears’ exboyfriend is pictured here, groomed within an inch of his life, because he’s on trial in Van Nuys for running over a process server. The obvious question is – will this photo of Adnan get Britney all worked up, wanting to see him again?

VINNIE JONES TURNED ON THE CHARM

Filed Under: Crimes and Misdemeaners > Vinnie Jones

Photo Credit: Splash News

You’d never guess by the look on his face, but Vinnie Jones is a free man – he was just found not guilty of three counts of assault in a bar brawl in South Dakota. Jones was in South Dakota “hunting pheasant.” No kidding. The guy Vinnie punched sold his story to a British tabloid and made money. Jones really dressed up for court and it paid off. Why anybody would start a fight with him is hard to imagine.

LANE GARRISON: CAN HOLLYWOOD FORGIVE AND FORGET?

Filed Under: Crimes and Misdemeaners > DUI > Lane Garrison > Rehab

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

Lane Garrison, looking paler and thinner, is out of prison and on his way to rehab where he will be locked up for another six months. In 2007 Lane was sentenced to 3 years and four months in prison for a drunk driving accident that left one boy dead and two teen girls injured. While he was incarcerated, Lane took college courses, studying Spanish and business, and he was a model of good behavior. After rehab, he’ll be on probation for four years. Will Lane, who ironically appeared on “Prison Break,” still have a career in Hollywood?

WISEGUY KEN WAHL IS ACCUSING HIS EXWIFE CORRINE OF PILFERING HIS MONEY – TO FEED HER PLASTIC SURGERY ADDICTION?

Filed Under: Corrine Alphen > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Ken Wahl > Lawsuit > Money > Shane Barbi

Heart throb Ken Wahl, who pretty much retired from acting after a serious spinal injury in the early 90’s, has finally figured out where all his money went. Not only did he file suit against his business manager Henry Levine, but he has accused his exwife Corrine Alphen of conniving with Levine to steal millions of dollars of his money. Wahl, currently married to Shane Barbi, believes Corinne filtered money in and out of a trust fund he set up for their son Raymond. Acquaintances of Corrine aren’t surprised. They say the naturally beautiful Penthouse Pet became addicted to expensive plastic surgery. Besides having yearly liposuction, she redid her face, lips, breasts, and augmented her butt and calves! THAT’S what Corrine’s used Ken’s money for! Now Corrine charges a dollar a minute for her Tarot reading service online. (Above, Ken and Corrine, in happier days)

PHIL SPECTOR SURRENDERED HIS CROWNING GLORY

Filed Under: Crimes and Misdemeaners > Fake! > Hair! > Jail > Phil Spector

Phil Spector suffered the ultimate humiliation when he was checked into the Twin Towers prison in LA – his wig was confiscated. Spector seems to have been wearing wigs for much of his life and is never seen without one. He nonchalantly even chose to wear several different styles and colors to his two trials. It wasn’t until Lyle Menendez was forced to give up his wig that we realized that hairpieces were considered contraband in prison. We wonder if the wig will be returned to him so he can wear it to court for his sentencing. Come to think of it…those TEETH look rather fake too.

PAUL MCCARTNEY SHOULD HAVE KNOWN BETTER

Filed Under: Beatles > Car Culture > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Paul McCartney

Photo Credit: Splash News

Paul McCartney takes liberties when it comes to parking in LA. Not only did he parallel park his black sportscar backwards, facing traffic, but it was a red zone! He stopped to run an errand in West Hollywood and paparazzi poked fun at his “UK parking.” Paul didn’t get a ticket, but he jokingly warned photographers that if they followed him, they’d better drive safely. McCartney is in town for George Harrison’s Hollywood Walk of Fame ceremony yesterday.

GUILTY PHIL SPECTOR IS IN SHOCK

Filed Under: Crimes and Misdemeaners > Guilty > Lana Clarkson > Phil Spector

Photo: GETTY
It’s been six years, but Lana Clarkson can rest in peace, at last. The revolting Phil Spector (whose excellent music has nothing to do with his demeanor) has been found guilty and faces a sentence of fifteen years to life for second degree murder. No one is more surprised than he is. He’s been getting away with close to murder for years, brandishing guns and terrorizing women and children. We’re betting he’s done nothing to prepare for this sentence because he really thought he could get away with murder. The world is a better place!

TWO TRAGEDIES: FARRAH AND REDMOND

Filed Under: Cancer > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Documentary > Farrah Fawcett > Redmond O'Neal

Photo Credit: Splash News

Redmond O’Neal was photographed Saturday leaving St John’s hospital where he visited his mother Farrah Fawcett. Farrah recently returned from Germany looking frail after cancer treatments. Sadly, she is reportedly unconscious and the family has been gathering. Despite this tragic turn of events, Redmond managed to get arrested for drug possession yet again on Sunday morning and remains in jail. It looks like Farrah’s documentary “A Wing and a Prayer” will not have a happy ending.

RICHARD BELZER'S DOG IS AN OCTOMOM

Filed Under: Crimes and Misdemeaners > Dogs > Oops! > Richard Belzer

Animal activist Richard Belzer, who promotes the adoption of homeless pets and has adopted two dogs of his own, has been accused of being an irresponsible dog owner. His female border collie mix Django was not spayed and according to sources in animal activism, he allowed her to mate with another dog in Central Park. She gave birth to eight puppies recently and now he has to scramble to find homes for them. Keep in mind that thousands of shelter dogs are killed every year because they cannot find homes. His fellow animal lovers are calling the “Law & Order” star a hypocrite and WORSE…

SOMEBODY PLEASE STUFF A SOCK IN BERNIE MADOFF'S MOUTH

Filed Under: Bernard Madoff > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Joe Queenan > Ponzi

Writer Joe Queenan brilliantly summed up the absurdity of Ponzi scammer Bernard Madoff’s courtroom “apology” in the LA Times. Madoff admitted he had “deeply hurt many, many, people” and said “I cannot adequately express how sorry I am for what I have done.” The writer pointed out that Madoff couldn’t be THAT sorry because genuine contrition requires RESTITUTION. Madoff made NO effort to help the government locate any of the 60 billion dollars he allegedly stole, and REFUSES to identify his confederates. His vapid apology translates to: “I regret the distress I’ve caused, but I’m keeping the money. And leave my wife out of this.”
Let’s face it, most public apologies like his are just another insult to his victims.

Posted by Janet on March 17, 2009

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CHRIS BROWN SWEET TALKED HIMSELF BACK INTO RIHANNA'S LIFE AND P DIDDY PLAYED CUPID

Filed Under: Chris Brown > Crimes and Misdemeaners > P. Diddy > Rihanna > Together Again

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News

It’s official – Rihanna has been brainwashed. Just as we figured might happen, she has forgiven Chris Brown. Chris had been violent BEFORE the Grammy beating, and she has apparently gotten used to it. According to People mag, they are together in Florida at a house owned by P Diddy. Why Diddy is sticking his nose into this, we don’t know. Chris convinced Rihanna that it was HER fault for MAKING him mad and he lost control because he loves her SO much. Really. The worst may be yet to come.

WE TOLD YOU SO!

Filed Under: Chris Brown > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Rihanna

Photo: TMZ
TMZ finally posted a picture of Rihanna revealing her bruises right after the “incident” and it clearly shows exactly what we told you- she has two black eyes and broken teeth. (We’re betting the teeth have already been fixed.) Also remember, OUR source revealed exclusively that this wasn’t the first time Chris Brown abused her.

WE WOULDN'T WANT TO BE IN CHRIS BROWN'S SHOES

Filed Under: Chris Brown > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Jay Z > Rihanna

Photo Credit: Buzz Foto

Jay-Z is MAD. He was out last night without Beyonce and he was in a dour mood. Not surprising, since new and appalling details about his protege Rihanna’s condition continue to trickle out. The beating she took from Chris Brown was far worse than first reported – now there are also rumors that she has kidney damage. It’s understood among the hip hop crowd that Chris Brown’s career is OVER.

RIHANNA'S FAMILY TO CHRIS BROWN: DON'T CALL OR TEXT!

Filed Under: Chris Brown > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Domestic Abuse > Rihanna

Photo Credit: Splash News

These are the seats at the Grammys that were reserved for Rihanna and Chris Brown. Rihanna’s family is hoping they will never see Chris Brown’s face again, after he beat up Rihanna. The two families are trying to keep Chris and Rihanna as far apart as possible. For legal reasons, Chris’s family doesn’t want him contacting her. And Rihanna’s family is terrified that Chris will beg for forgiveness – using those old lines “I lost control because I love you” and “It’s your fault – you made me do it.” They’re scared that after the dust settles and bruises heal, she might LISTEN.

OCTOMOM IS ALREADY COLLECTING TAXPAYER'S MONEY

Filed Under: Crimes and Misdemeaners > Fertilization > Money > Nadya Suleman > Octuplets

The octuplet story just keeps getting more sordid, because the tormented American taxpayers are footing much of the bill. Not only has Octomom Nadya Suleman been receiving almost $500 a month in food stamps, but according to the LA Times, she collects federal benefits for three disabled children, from her previous six. And her Kaiser Medical Center has asked California’s health plan for the poor to pay her monumental hospital bills! To no one’s surprise, Nadya’s fertility doctor turned out to be a shady character. Besides his insane fertilization of Nadya, Dr Michael Kamrava has been accused by former employees of engaging in “systematic insurance and tax fraud.” He requires patients to pay in CASH, “which was never entered into the computer or deposited in a bank.” Note to President Obama: Let’s take a long hard look at disability payments in general.

RIHANNA: TWO BLACK EYES AND BROKEN TEETH, AND IT ISN'T THE FIRST TIME!

Filed Under: Black Eye > Chris Brown > Crimes and Misdemeaners > Domestic Abuse > Rihanna

Any minute now, photos of Rihanna’s beat up face are going to be released by police and we hear they AREN’T PRETTY. In fact we were told that Rihanna has TWO black eyes and broken teeth! (Those gorgeous teeth!) This was no love-slap. And we got a few more details: the battling couple was driving in Hancock Park (looking for Korean BBQ?) in Chris’s rented Lamborghini when the arguing escalated and they pulled over. Rihanna had supposedly found numbers in Chris’s phone that he shouldn’t have. She grabbed the car keys and pretended to toss them out the window. THAT did it. He FREAKED out and let her have it. And we also heard THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE.

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