This story was posted in May, 2006, and Andrew Morton, the author of “Tom Cruise: The Unauthorized Biography” called us to discuss it and other matters when he was researching his book. We asked him not to credit us because books can be problematic legally and we are afraid of the Scientologists. You read it here first!

We hear that Suri Cruise is being closely watched by the Scientologists because she COULD turn out to be L Ron Hubbard reincarnated! It brings to mind Rosemary’s Baby, doesn’t it? Anyway, the Scientology bunch has been eagerly awaiting the return of their departed spiritual leader. They believe when a Scientologist dies that they select a baby’s body and take over the soul. When the baby grows up it is drawn to Scientology.

They calculate that Hubbard would select a very special child in which to make his return. Tom Cruise and Katie would be ideal parents for an L Ron Hubbard baby. Consequently they are looking for any sign that Suri has a link to Hubbard. Most likely they’ll have to wait until Suri can talk and begins her auditing classes. Who knows? She might start quoting passages from Dianetics.

For those of you who think my reference to Rosemary’s Baby is far-fetched: Here’s a synopsis of the movie from Yahoo:

“A young married couple, trying unsuccessfully to conceive, finally have it happen when the husband strikes a deal with the devil worshippers next door. All of this is unbeknownst to the poor wife/mother who soon realizes she could be having Satan’s child.”

I rest my case!


Posted by hoodlum on January 7, 2008

There are 27 Comments.  TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!

27 Comments so far

  1. By Anonymous
    On January 7, 2008 at

    I dont believe this.
    I respect you Miss Charlton, not that Morton guy but seriously, this theory is too far fetched to believe.
    This Scientology business is weird enough as it is without embellishment.
    Case in point, the grand pooba of Scientology accompanied Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes on their honeymoon.
    This actually happened, I recall seeing a photo of Miscavage on the yacht with Tom Cruise, I thought this was incredible.

  2. By Anonymous
    On January 7, 2008 at

    William Mapother is Suri’s biological father.

  3. By Anonymous
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Who is William Mapother?

  4. By E. T. phone home
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Why not do a DNA now to see if Tom is the pappy? This next line is gross I know, but here goes….It would be relatively easy to shoot some pre-frozen Hubbard sperm up Katie while she was being examined by a Scientology gynecologist. No Scientologist is allowed to see any doctor other than an approved Sci doctor and/or gynecologist. If this is true, this will be the biggest story EVER, EVER.

  5. By Anonymous
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Uh, Janet – if you asked Morton not to credit you for this information because of your fear of Scientologists/a lawsuit, why bring it out now??

  6. By Janet
    On January 7, 2008 at

    To 3:29,
    A BOOK is far more permanent than a website -it cannot be erased! What I wrote was presented as purely theoretical- not established fact. Simply food for thought. Yes, I am afraid of them.

  7. By Anonymous
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Hubbard died in Jan 1986. I’m not sure if DNA technology was such that it could be frozen back then. Anybody know?
    This is a very interesting theory. The item doesn’t explicitely say Hubbard’s DNA – just that the Scieno-crazies are waiting for the “reincarnated Hubbard”. That doesn’t have to be from Hubbard’s DNS – just his “spirit”.

  8. By Pam
    On January 7, 2008 at

    I always read your column but to hurt a small innocnent child has gone too far This time you went too far. Pick on the grownups.Leave the kid alone. There are other gossip columns to read.

  9. By Anonymous
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Years ago Tom’s first wife Mimi Rogers told the world that he was sterile. So how could he be the father of Suri?

  10. By gerard Vandenberg
    On January 7, 2008 at

    FAGGOT-BOY tommy, which DWARFNUMBER is yours?
    And who is the snow-white-smiling dentures?
    dr. phil!!

  11. By skippy handelman
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Janet, you certainly are not reluctant about blowing your own horn. You remind me somewhat in passing of that inbred Texas jackass Dr. Phil. Now turn your head and cough. ok.

  12. By Jenn
    On January 7, 2008 at

    Janet, you are a religous biggot. Your ‘god’ allowed 70 million deaths in ww2.

  13. By Patrick
    On January 7, 2008 at

    All religions divide.
    Still if your going to let yourself be sucked in.
    May as well pick a ridiculously, crazy one.

  14. By thank God I escaped LA
    On January 8, 2008 at

    Woah. “Jenn 9:24” don’t call Janet a religous biggot, when your words are pure ignorence.
    It you are going to hate on her, then go read Perez or one of the now hundreds of gossip internet columns. Janet is a legend in Hollywood and has paid her dues!
    Janet-this is super crazy, however, time will only tell. Suri is going to grow up with Nicole Richies baby, Gwen’s kids, so many others to name; she will have a major influence.
    God bless America.
    -and ps. i’m not a republican. VOTE OBAMA!!!!!

  15. By Sandy Loo
    On January 8, 2008 at

    Dear Janet! I am more than disappointed with your synopsis regardless of whether Andrew Morten has written this in his new book or not. It is unfair on this poor little girl who through no fault of her own happens to be born into the Cruise household. I only hope her mother wakes up to herself one day and gets out of this damaging cult. Sandy

  16. By Anonymous
    On January 8, 2008 at

    If Suri starts writing bad science fiction when she grows up…

  17. By Anonymous
    On January 8, 2008 at

    it’s her ex boyfriend’s baby…

  18. By Anonymous
    On January 8, 2008 at

    Very few can see how truly truly bad bad and DEMONIC Scientology really is. Go to Wikipedia Scientology and read it.

  19. By Brian birchall, rancher
    On January 8, 2008 at

    The catholic church and protestant evangelism are more demonic than scientlogy could ever be.

  20. By Anonymous
    On January 9, 2008 at

    william mapother is tom’s cousin. mapother is tom’s real last name.
    tom shoots blanks. katie was knocked up before she got with tom.
    did morton say anything about the different size bumps that katie was walking around with for the seemingly 24 months she was pregnant?
    $cientology is effed up.

  21. By Anonymous
    On January 9, 2008 at

    i thought that tom was the official messiah of $cientology…you know, since he paid the million dollars to be OT8 and be brainwashed into thinking that it would give him cartoon superhero powers like the ability to fly and bend time and space. wait! after all that tom was still shooting blanks! maybe it doesnt matter since the only one who audits his weiner is david miscarriage, alien leader.

  22. By Anonymous
    On January 9, 2008 at

    major inferiority complex in the making….
    my father is an actor and the messiah, and i am told that i have millions of thetan aliens inhabiting my body and posessing my soul and making me say and do things. i tried to tell mama that i didn’t do it, the thetans did, but i still got a spanking.

  23. By Anonymous
    On January 9, 2008 at

    of course El Rubber Hubbard wouldn’t reincarnate into the body of some regular ole’ schmoe.

  24. By Anonymous
    On January 9, 2008 at

    again: she was pregnant before she got with Tom…it’s her exboyfriend’s baby…

  25. By Hollywoo FBI
    On January 9, 2008 at

    His flacid penis is slightly over 1 1/2 inches long. In the turgid state, it is 2 1/2 inches long. When he stays is the pool too long, there is shrinkage, significant shrinkage. I can not divulge how I came by this information, except to say it is entirely accurate. One small clue: I am very good friends with wifey #1, Mimi Rogers.

  26. By Hollywood FBI
    On January 9, 2008 at

    Oops, on the measurements…the flacid penis is only slightly over 1 inch long, not 1 1/2 inches long. And, don’t get me started on his height…maybe 5 foot 7, with lifts? Oh, how much intimate info I could sell to the rags, boggles my mind. Thanx, Mimi

  27. I do believe all the ideas you have presented in your post.
    They are very convincing and can certainly work. Still, the posts are too brief for
    beginners. May just you please extend them a little from next time?
    Thank you for the post.


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